FAMILY VALUES BETWEEN AMERICAN AND VIETNAMESE

           

FAMILY VALUES

            Family is one of the basic values of American. In America, the structure of family considered a small family consist of husband, wife and children called “immediately family” and a big family consist of parents, grandparents, aunts…called “extended family” . Since 1950s the structure of family also has change into “nuclear family” with husband, wife and children living in house. Each parent has a responsibility to take care of their children. The family values also emphasis on the role of child. Following children must respect their parents. Also, parents has the responsibility to teach children the way to be independent, self- reliance individuals and the way to be become a good person for society. At the same time, parents usually encourage also create chance to develop their interest and ability for children.                                                                  Besides, each member is equal for their right; children have the right in getting ideas, giving own opinion with members in the family. However, if children have too much personal freedom; sometimes, it is not good thing, parents don’t control them overtime, so children may be have the bad behavior which damages themselves or even we can not unpredictable. The problem about marriage and divorce also is concerned in America, marriage is optional, it does not depend on anything, young people find out husband or wife with their interest without intervening from parents or relations. Almost, marriage usually based on friendship between people where they are sympathize, happy and decide to get marriage, so marriage is proof of their love. However, if they have a problem which can not find the way to solve to satisfy both or they felt unhappy life, they will get divorce. It is a legal in the US; that is a part cause leads to the increasing of divorce rates in America. The statistic indicated 50% of marriages end in divorce; it is common in America society. And many people think divorce will better for children who bear an argument from their parents.              Nowadays, the family values are breaking with tradition by the high rate of divorce and the increasing the rates of single parents and gay parents. This is a big problem in America society. It effects directly on attitudes also life in the US.

           Firstly, the article “Marriage rate in America drops drastically” the report indicates that the marriage rates had trend decreasing in nearly year. The rate people get marriage following form of traditional family is very less with the other kinds of living arrangement such as living with someone without being married, living on your own or even living as a single parent. In the past, that thing is not acceptable, but now it has become popular in society. Meanwhile, the report also showed that the age for people to get marriage is increasing. For example, among men who get married for the first time, haft are nearly 29 years old or older, and among women who get married for the first time, haft are about 27 years old or order. It is a big change in family American. One of the cause leads to this change is that most of people want to have the time to prepare for adequately life before they settle; they want to have a position in society to ensure their income and their wealth. Besides, the report mention about marriage, this is a problem which is concerning of America government. It reflects a part of lifestyle and cultures of the US nowadays.

            Secondly, the divorce rate mentioned in the article “The great recession is affect on divorce” following the report the divorce rate is decreasing. One of the cause leads to this status is the decline of economy. In addition, the unemployment rates is raising more and more, thus, many couples do not have enough money to support themselves separated and pay for their other financial obligation. Moreover, the average a cost of a divorce is estimated at around $15.000, it is the fee so much to get a divorce, they can not afford to split up. Therefore, they choose to remain together out of economic necessity, another reason is the depressed housing market. It is disadvantaged in sale to separate financially, this is also reason that many couples delayed their divorces because if they get devorce, they will face to the lacking finances, it is the bad thing. So, the best way is they will try to solve their economic issues together. This is a solution which the couple chosen to overcome the finances pressure from the broken economy nowadays. The great recession in the US has directly affected the economic and personal lives’s of America. This status had changed attitude of American about the values of family, especially divorce, if the past, divorce is so common, but now if the couple decides to get married; they rethink about finances or how to do live or damage separate or divorce?. It changed the way of thinking about divorce of America.

          Thirdly, the structure family also changed through the article “The evolution of the TV family” TV family is known through the beloved series “Leave It To Bear” which was released in DVD standing in sharp contrast to some of family on the small screen today. The TV shows many family focus on kinds of “Modern Family”, TV shows many aspects reality relating to family such as the picture- perfect home life in “The Donna Reed Show” or “Father Know Best”, single motherhood or even the challenges of gay couple parents. TV family showed comedy picture on TV to indicate the reality also explore social trends. With the comedy feature of TV family on filmed, the viewer can look and see parts of their family in the show. Besides, TV family contributes to change the way of thinking about some-sex marriage (gay or les relationship), they are understand and sympathized. Therefore, update reality news to all people. By the way shows on TV, the viewer have the different attitudes about structure and “expended family” in the US. It supplies to viewer with kind of family diversity. Furthermore, TV family shows the emotion and the way to action of each character on filmed. Although the TV family shows the character who aren’t perfect but they are all people that the average viewer world love to have in their own family. Therefore, TV family plays the important role in society nowadays, it reflects lifestyle of American; affecting on attitudes of people from traditional family to “Modern Family” with structure diversity. With the evolution of the TV family, it creates the balance also harmony between person to person in society. At the same time, it promotes the development of technology for entertain in the US.

           In general, family in the US also has some points similar to Vietnam, the first thing is the family structure; each typical family has parents and children. Next, it is the role of child, children must respect the older and must to be obedience the older. Conversely, parents also have responsibility to take care of children. At the same time, creating the best condition for children well- educated. Finally, it is the same the equality in the family, they have the rights to get ideas also share own opinion with their parents. However, there are also several differences between the US and Vietnam. One of the differences is the raising children. In US, children have their own beds, their own rooms with personal spaces, each childdren don’t routinely sleep with their parents, they learned to be independent as child. In contrast, in Vietnam, children depend directly on their parents; if they leave far from parents for a long time, it is difficult to adoption with new environment. That thing is easy to realize why student in US have the same the age but they are more active than student Vietnam. However, with the way to let children too much individual- personal space, it sometimes is not good because parents don’t control their children. Perhaps, children will have some bad behaviors when they contact with outside. This is a negative side of individuals in the US. In addition, the older often live with younger (their children) and children has responsibility to take care of them. On the contrary, in US, the older rarely live in the same home with married son or daughter, they usually live in a nursing house, it is common in the US, they want to live independently without their children. Also, marriage is arranged between by parents or relatives, that can be the promises between two friend families. Nowadays, it is not much but it also affected the traditional view of aristocratic family in Vietnam; especially, Vietnam do not allow marriage between people have the same blood- relationship with any reason because it damages the family roles. And it has bad effect for the generation later. By contrast, marriages are not “arrange” in the US, young people is freedom in choosing their spouse, even parents don’t know a wedding plan until children decide to get married; one more time emphasis on individual values in America. Therefore, in my view, the similar or difference depends on custom, lifestyle also habit of each country, each country has own identity. Being a Vietnamese I understand the role of family, it is important for me and for all people.